KIMBERLY SELENA

Hi. 

I wanted to talk about my major since it is something I have been asked about.

I am leaning towards a English Major.
I love writing, enjoy reading and English has always been my favorite subject.
But don't let this fool you. I was very uncertain on what I wanted to do, where I was headed and who I was. At times, I'm still uncertain. I still have doubts. I still question my moves no matter how confident I seem when I take them. Yet, I have come to realize life is uncertain, you can focus your whole life on a certain path only to be swept off as soon as you are about to reach your goal.

If I could give any advice is: Do not fear the Unknown.

The Unknown tends to be magical, exciting and new. Something we all fear.
I know I want a English Major.
I know there is plenty of jobs out there for me.
I know that when I was younger I wanted to be a teacher.

Yet I don't know where life will be taking me in a month, a year even five years. Maybe I end up becoming a digital copywriter and forget to be a teacher. Maybe I end up being a flight attendant. Maybe I decided to be a teacher as soon as I graduate. Maybe my blog hits off and I get to do this forever. I don't know what is going to happen and that is something that tend to be exciting.

All my life I tried to make no mistakes. Try to keep it all together. Stay in my own lane, within my comfort zone. I have a list of jobs I want to experience written down in my journal, yet I would get so scared to try them out I made excuses why it would be best not to apply.

When I sat down and told my parents I wanted to pursue writing because that is what I love.
I was so scared. My hands were sweating, I didn't want my heroes to tell me it was stupid, because I mean anyone can write, how was I going to make a living out of it, what even was a writing career, but instead they supported me. 100 PERCENT.

They told me to do what I love. To finish a career. Get my diploma. Go after all the jobs I want to pursue. To keep my options open. That I was so young I could do anything.

I am not going to lie. I lay my future out. I plan it. I write it down and mold it to my liking. Yet, I still have doubts. But that is a human thought, we have doubts because we don't know if we are good enough for our own dreams, because they seem big. But want some advice there is no such thing as a dream that is too big. The bigger you dream, the better. Crave to want more. Crave to be happy. Forget how much money you will receive. Think of the experience you will gain.

I want to do so much.

I feel like humans are made to do different things.
No person was made to do one thing their whole life, that becomes a routine and routine turns into dullness. If you strongly believe you were made to be just one thing your whole life, you need to explore who you are a little bit more.

x x

Guys! I have started my third semester in college and I am already bombarded with loads of assignments and readings and homework and stuff! 

A couple of people have asked me why it's my third semester and not my fourth, so I decided to kind of just lay it out and speak up on my experience on how I felt about college. 

If you are in high school and you are freaking about college next year, believe me you are not alone! 

Most people say you have to have your college picked up by junior year and I did but did I apply? Nope. I wasn't ready to move on from high school. I wasn't ready to grow up. 

I did eventually applied during my senior year, I didn't think much about college till after my graduation. Even then I was more focus of spending a summer of relaxation due to the fact I had graduated high school. 

Until August came and I received a email saying I wasn't accepted to my University because I didn't submit a letter of recommendation. When I told my parents they began to tell me to not be bummed and apply to other colleges, but I just didn't want to. I felt this rush of panic and depression. My downfall after months of being okay. I remember not wanting to do anything with my life, I remember telling myself I wasn't going to be successful at anything. I remember sitting in my closet crying because I was lost, I didn't know where to go or what to do.

After two weeks of complete depression, I decided to apply to another college and to that job my sister kept telling me about. 

I missed a semester, but I am not ashamed for it. I wasn't ready. If I would have gone to school that semester, it would have just been a waste of my parents money. Instead I took the semester off to find what I was going to do with my life.

I am now in school taking courses I find interesting. I have the same job I applied to that August when I had no idea where my life was headed. I love my job. 

It's okay to take time off, just remember you need to get back on your path. Don't stay out on the sidelines, walk the marathon. I would say run, but I don't run. 

I wasn't ready then, but in a way I am ready now.

x x